ITs getting to be that time...

I love the holidays. I love the decorating, the overeating until i have to make myself puke so i can fall asleep, because if i don't i fear suffocating myself with my own stomach.... Oh and the family... Oh yes the family! I cant even tell you how entertaining it is for me to find out just how dysfunctional families can be. Now i do have the right to laugh about it because my family if FAR from normal. But what brought this post on is this... Now is the count down to when i see my family. So now is the time that they are calling my and texting me and trying to see how our part of the family is doing... Now to you, this may seem nice and sweet and normal, but to me, i know better. No, no no, they are digging up dirt to use on one another and trying to get the "award" of who has stayed in touch and knows what is going on with us (me) most "award". Ahhhh it is so entertaining. Oh and the best is the question of so... any men in your life? ALWAYS, Always does me being single have to be a topic of holiday conversation. I can hear it now. " Well why are you single?" "Your such a catch"... ok... so really if i knew why i was single do you think i would be single? HELLO! No i wouldn't. oh but my fave one is this.. " oh be glad your single i have to pick up your uncle's underwear because he is so lazy, he doesn't do anything, let me tell you men are useless, all they do is eat, shit, and watch tv.." Yes intriguing! i know... they ask me why i am single and tell me that there is someone out there, then in the same breath bitch to high heaven about their other half, and tell me why i should stay single.. Thanks but I do a great job of staying single on my own, i need no help in that department. And BTW i really am a-ok with being single during the holidays i have my eggnog and dog to keep me warm... Bring on the brandy!